The Wheels Couldn't Take It, The Engine Wouldn't Start

Anybody who knows me and my husband knows that we're not touchers. I mean, sure, huggin and kissin is great when you want to make out, but when it's time to go to sleep, you'd damn well better stick to your side of the bed or you're gonna be in trouble.

That's why it was so sweet that we went to sleep spooning last night. He's been out of town for two weeks and we get a little bit nostalgic for each other while we're apart. At least, it was sweet until I awoke myself -- and the man who has pledged himself to me for life -- with a Supersonic Fart. Not only was it a trumpeter, it also smelled BAD. Bad enough for him to pull the covers over my head so I could smell the mess I made, much in the manner that one would rub a dog's nose in its mess. And based on the aroma, just as cruel.

Happy Early Christmas, Honey.

A few weeks ago my girlfriend Stephanie's Nintendo DS stopped working. Her immediate response was to ask for one for Christmas, but being the electronics geek I profess myself to be, I decided to try to find a way to fix it. I ordered a touchscreen and a top screen (just to have a backup) off of eBay, along with a specialty screwdriver kit, since Nintendo uses specialty screws (Phillips head screws with three notches instead of four). They came in the mail today, and I sequestered myself in a room without cats to begin the task of replacing the dead screen.

I unscrewed the first seven screws without incident and took off the back panel. There were four more screws to go before I could remove the circuit board and take out the old screen. The first three screws came out no problem. The fourth screw, however, was being a little bastard, and the fantastic screwdriver kit I ordered wasn't holding up to the rigors of having to unscrew more than ten screws. More tools were called for.

One Swiss Army Knife, a hammer (because, well, why not?), some tool that I think is supposed to be used for poking cheese and some frustration later, and I was left with a completely stripped screw. Forty-five minutes later and I was back from the store with a brand-spankin'-new Nintendo DS Lite (a newer, better version than the original version she had). I'm bad with tools.

Natural Hormone!!

Again, nothing to do with anything other than hilarity. I love Chicago Food Corp. I stopped there yesterday after work to buy some tofu and whatnot. On my way in, I saw the Pomegranate - Natural Hormone!! sign and had to take a picture. Sadly, I did not get a picture of the sign advertising "Squid Tube". I have no idea.

Squirrels!

This has nothing to do with being glamorous or adult. It's just a taxidermied squirrel lamp that is the best and most terrifying thing I've ever seen. Fortunately, The Trainable intervened and prevented me from buying it at the flea market. Dammit.